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Latest Time Magazine Photoshoot Reveals That Paul Ryan Is Actually That 16-Year Old Kid Who Lifts Weights In His Parents’ Basement

Jenn

This week, Time Magazine, reaffirming its commitment to report nothing that could even remotely be construed as news-worthy in the upcoming presidential election, featured a photoshoot of vice presidential candidate Paul Ryan, dressed like an extra from Saved by the Bell and curling some dumbbells. All set against a backdrop that could best be described as “yearbook picture chic”.

Meet the picture that Time Magazine deemed publication-worthy.

This would be way more hardcore if Paul Ryan weren't curling less weight than I do.

And here are the outtakes:

This is actually a 400 lb dumbbell. In the same way that Paul Ryan ran that sub-3:00 marathon that one time.
"No, really, Mitt. This photoshoot is *TOTALLY* gonna help the electorate take me more seriously.
This looks like Paul Ryan is deep in thought, like the thinker. But he's actually trying to scratch his nose. With a 40lb free weight. The man who would be president of the United States if something catastrophic happened to Mitt Romney, ladies and gentlemen.
Hey, at least we can give Time Magazine some credit: they realized that an image of Paul Ryan sitting in a gym in a full suit with dumbbells scattered around him was too absurd even for them. Because showing Ryan as even remotely seriously as a vice presidential candidate is just too implausible.

Someone in the Romney campaign staff deserves a medal for approving this photoshoot. Then they deserve to be fired. Then, I will buy them a steak dinner.

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